my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
