I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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