we're blogging at a bar
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
