i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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