Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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