my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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