we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize