You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
