i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
