he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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