i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize