wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Randomize