I hate your face
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
