But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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