I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
He felt like a one man threesome
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
