I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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