Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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