i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Randomize
