He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
