Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Randomize