on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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