just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
