No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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