i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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