we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
