I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
