dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
