I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
