I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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