Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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