She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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