she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Be still, my beating vagina.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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