Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
