And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
