How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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