He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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