Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
