i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
my liver is dry heaving
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
