okay pat passed out under dana's car
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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