It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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