the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Drunk is not a location!
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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