if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
