glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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