I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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