The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize