beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize