sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
