She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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