I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
