I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
